By Claudio E. Cabrera

In case you didn’t notice from the flyers with men in toga outfits and thongs sprawled on our Washington Heights and Inwood sidewalks, there’s a gay club in Dyckman. Yes, there’s a LGBT club not only on Dyckman, but on Dyckman and Nagle and it’s called Le Boy.

It is right where Villa Patron used to be – and if you ask me – I’m glad they replaced Villa Patron because they closed and opened more often than Jubilee Restaurant on Hillside Ave.

But before I continue, this isn’t a coming out of the closet moment. No, no, no. You will totally understand why I went to this club as you read on.

Now, in the history of our neighborhood, there has been one gay club, which I can even remember. It was where Arka was on 193rd street and Broadway. This was maybe a decade or so ago. No one in the neighborhood knew – and even when my friends would talk about it – we would whisper. Some people believed it; some didn’t. Some would be amazed at the idea, while some would cringe at the thought.

When I heard about a gay club opening on 177th and Broadway (No Parking is the name), I didn’t think much of it. When I heard Le Boy opened on Nagle, I didn’t think much of it either. Well, I did sort of. I mean, let’s be real – 177th and Broadway isn’t as close to rough as Nagle is. Never has and never will be. ‘No Homo’ is heard a lot more East of Broadway than it ever will be West of Broadway.

What is ‘No Homo’ you ask?

It’s urban slang created by a group called Dipset in 2002-03. It’s basically this:

‘Man my back hurts’

If you were to say that in front of a guy, you’d have to say ‘No Homo’ before or right after because someone may say you’re implying a guy banged you.


Now, admittedly (to no ones shock), my side of town is much rougher than the side of town where I thought they would put a gay club at initially. Homophobia is much more prevalent here than on the other side. I have no scientific evidence behind all this, but they are as close to fact as you can believe.

So whenever I would pass Le Boy, I always said: ‘I would never catch myself dead in there.’


Because what if I saw someone I knew who I never thought to be gay.

‘Dimelo Claudio dique tu te gusta los hombres? (Translation: What’s Up Claudio? I didn’t know you liked men)’

What if someone saw me standing on line?

‘Man I seen Claudio standing on that gay club’s line. I never knew this dude was on that. I ain’t hanging with that cat anymore.’

Those were risks I wasn’t willing to take.


I ended up taking the risk – and I’m glad I did – because it was a great experience.

It all started a few Friday’s ago when me and a fellow UC writer, Carolina, met up near the venue. I told her to meet me across the street at Dyckman Express.


Because I wanted to make sure that when we got to the line, there weren’t any people waiting. We waited across the street for fifteen minutes until the line was clear and then made a mad dash to the venue.

So security checked us while I had my head down and turned to the left. I was trying to shield my face.

The door opened and…

It was a bunch of guys in tight clothing; some in baggy clothing (no different than a straight club). Men in underwear dancing on top of fixtures – while clubgoers were putting dollars in their undies like it was a strip club (pretty different from a straight club). There was non-stop dancing, and maybe I was paranoid, but there were guys burning a hole in me like Cyclops with their eyes. I felt like a piece of meat a few times during the night.

That’s how the first 5 minutes went.

I held Carolina so tight that night, she may still be recovering from the bruises on her hand. I said at least five times: ‘You are my wife for the night.’

Now before I continue, let me explain why I went to Le Boy. A friend and her husband wanted to check out the place. They heard a lot about it and were shocked that Inwood had a gay club on Nagle out of all places (FYI: They are going to have a Halloween party there too).

They were talking about it for a few weeks and we ended up going. I was extremely reluctant, but said: Whatever, I’ll check it out. Mostly because if I didn’t go, my friend would probably ex-communicate me and bury our friendship. She was the neighborhood gravedigger to many if you didn’t know.

So, after about a few hours of being stiff (doesn’t sound right), I loosened up (doesn’t sound right either) and had a good time. I danced with Carolina a bit and even jokingly danced with my friend’s husband. I even got mobbed by a few of her gay friends – because they said I needed to have fun – and I just started snapping my fingers, moving my head like the Roxbury guys and backing it up (I’m kidding…sort of).

We spent at least 2 hours at Le Boy, and while I drank a lot and needed to go to the bathroom, I refused. I heard the urinals were a bit too close for comfort; like in a circle of some sorts. I held it in.

But overall, I had a really great time. I met some new people in the neighborhood who are doing great things. Some guys named Mickey, Brandon, and a few others. I even met a gay guy from my building who always walks around in booty shorts even if its winter (Don’t ask me). I told them all to join my brunch and supper club. Hopefully, I’ll see them there.

It’s funny, because the other day I saw Mickey while I was on the corner of Dyckman and Nagle with a friend. Mickey is the most blatantly gay White guy you will ever meet on an appearance level. If you have any type of gaydar, the ding ding sound will immediately go off in your head. I tried to turn away as he approached, but I knew it’d be wrong. I shook his hand and said: ‘What up Mickey?’

My friend looked at me mad strange. Mickey made it worse by saying: ‘Have you been back?’ I said: ‘No.’ My friend couldn’t comprehend it as he didn’t say ‘Le Boy’, but didn’t say anything. I didn’t say anything either after Mickey left about him.

But the most important part of this whole story isn’t how cool Le Boy is (the drinks and the atmosphere), it’s about these White, Black, and Latino men all coming together on an Uptown street. The gentrifying crowd meets the local crowd and everyone was getting along.

Now, despite the fact that I met great people and had a good time, would ‘I’ be comfortable going there again? Probably not. I mean, I enjoyed it, but it’s in my neighborhood. It’s a bit too close for comfort. If some girlfriends said let’s go to a gay club somewhere else, I’d probably go.

Now before you think I’m some sort of homophobe, remember, I went to the club. I have no issues with anybody. I’m a man of color – discriminating is something I know of and don’t plan to do to anyone else. There’s no Carl Paladino in me.

But, what I will say to all those who think a gay club on Nagle is dangerous, believe me, it isn’t. There may be plenty of homophobic Dominicans up here in the Heights (I have a few in my family), but they won’t waste their time shouting slurs or beating up people. Believe me, they wouldn’t.

The other day I sat back and thought if I was 18, how would I react to this club. I may have a few things to say. I won’t lie. I wasn’t gay friendly at the time. I don’t think any of my friends were. Even to this day I say ‘No Homo’ when people say something that can be interpreted as gay. I should stop.

But when I went to college and our minds grew, things changed. We came to learn that gays are no different than any of us; and considering the discrimination we’ve faced, why would we want someone else to face the same. If anything, we have to help them and judging from the first few months of Le Boy being open – Nagle and the surrounding blocks and avenues don’t have anything against it either – to the point where violence will occur.

Le Boy is a fabulous establishment that can get a little packed sometimes, but it is because it may be the most popular ‘Club’ in the neighborhood. Not gay club, but club, with the way the lines look when you pass it on a Friday or Saturday night.

I’m proud of this neighborhood. It’s one thing to see White and Black families moving up here to raise children; It’s one thing to see a Dominican flag waving from every restaurant, bar, and barber shop. But the colorful LGBT flag waving on Dyckman Street? That’s the true sign of not only this neighborhood’s growth but also its ability to accept all people.

All people…

Best of luck Le Boy…

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  • Eileen
    October 22, 2010 at 11:29 am

    I thoroughly enjoyed this article. Thanks for the laugh 🙂

  • De La Cruzin'
    October 22, 2010 at 11:56 am

    Very well written and honest point of view. It is surprising to see how far the neighborhood is progressing in diversity.

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  • stephen
    October 22, 2010 at 2:20 pm

    Maybe I can secretly dash into a Dominican club and jokingly dance with one of your dark skinned friends – you know, just for giggles. Just to say I did it. Course I’ll be sure to wait until the line is clear and hide my face before going in, because i couldn’t bear people thinking i was dark skinned myself! The horror! I’m totally not racist though.

    I would probably have a great time. I might even run into that Dominican dude from my building. The one that’s always wearing too much cologne (dont ask me!)

    Oh, by the way, I’m super proud of how this neighborhood is really becoming inclusive of all people. All people – even dark-skinned ones!

    • OnTheRealThough
      October 22, 2010 at 4:07 pm

      Oh lord, here goes the sensitive dude who takes the article so literally, and acts like it’s uncommon for straight men to not be completely open to homosexuality since birth.

      He went to the club, had a good time & spoke on it with candor. It’s a start, and if you don’t get that…too bad. Look at the bigger picture, and calm the hell down.

      • stephen
        October 22, 2010 at 6:25 pm

        are you serious? this is no fucking joke – the same attitudes of shame and nonacceptance exhibited by the author by sheilding his face because he was afraid to even be seen at a gay club are exactly why teens kill themselves over this shit. the feelings of shame, scared of not being accepted by their friends and family.

        grow the fuck up – this is real life. this shit matters. although maybe the latest teen to commit suicide because they cant fathom living as a gay person is just being “sensitive”. if only they had you to tell them to calm the hell down and look at the bigger picture!

    • Claudio
      October 22, 2010 at 4:52 pm

      I didn’t expect this post to come without criticism. I wrote what I wrote. I know a lot of it can be looked upon as I’m some sort of homophobe, but I’m not here to convince anyone. I’m here to write an article about my experience. The end.

      • stephen
        October 22, 2010 at 6:34 pm

        thats great – but this may come as a shock to you but you dont get to self define as a non-homophobe. i cant go act all racist and then insist i’m not a racist. if my mock post about a dominican club was real, you and everyone else would be all over that shit. there would be outrage. but its the same freaking post, just a different minority. why is it ok to act like this to gay people? i may have been raised in a racist household but than doesnt give me a pass to treat you any different than anyone else -or does it? can i say “no dominican” with my buds and then tell you i’m cool with dominican people? Cmon.

        i’m all about you experiencing some cool club with people you might not ordinarily hang out with. but sugar, you cant get away with hiding your face because you cant fathom being taken as one of us, and then say, “i have no issues with anybody” i’ll call that bullshit out every time.

        own how you felt. dont pretend you dont have “issues with anybody”. learn from it and grow.

  • Zaida
    October 22, 2010 at 4:00 pm

    my sweet – thank you for writing such a refreshingly honest and funny story! it takes a lot of courage for us (our generation) to admit that we might have pre-programmed judgmental or racist or homophobic thoughts/tendencies.

    i know you, Claudio. you aren’t homophobic or gay. nevermind your fancy style and pretty face. of course you’re going to get scoped out. hell, im married and want to make out with you!! seriously, tho, there is something that we (hispanics) were taught at a very young age: we don’t talk about being gay. or bisexual. or curious. and if we do, it’s with side-eye. i’m saying this from the perspective of a woman with my mother who never came out as gay, and dated men to “hide” who she is/was. or like many of my aunts who had “roommates” but never publicly acknowledged that they were in love with another woman for 20+ years… also as a (formally?) bisexual woman who freaked out the day and months after i had the best sex ever in my 20’s: with an amazingly beautiful and talented woman. someone i never allowed myself to be in a relationship with because… what would my friends think?

    is that some dumbass shit or what?

    at the end of the day, it’s all nonsense.

    i completely understood your initial hesitation about going, but you joined us, had a great time just doing you, and like you said that night, it’s no big deal.

    like we told the owner, we couldn’t be more proud and excited that Le Boy is here, and we warned him that we’ll be dragging a shitload of mostly straight chicks there on Halloween.

    there isnt a crowd in the world more open and friendly and welcoming than the gay community. so thrilled Le Boy is in walking distance!

  • uptownco
    October 22, 2010 at 7:24 pm

    I appreciate the passion but I have to disagree. Claudio, as well as myself, come from cultures where homophobia is reflexive and persuasive. His post was a candid account of him trying to bridge that divide. It is a first step and it should be applauded. Thanks for the comments and keep them coming. Dialogue is a bridge to understanding.


  • Alex
    October 23, 2010 at 8:46 am

    As a white, gay man who has lived in the southern Heights (remember the gunshots all night on 163rd?) since 1979, I applaud the honesty of Caludio’s post, but truly hope it can lead to some soul searching and change the serious homophobia within the community. Every time a man (and it’s always a man) has muttered “maricón” when I pass, I stop and say, “if you have something to say to me, say it in English.” In 32 years, they never have. These attitudes are what lead to gay teen suicide–and I have known 2 teens from the Dominican community who killed themselves. When I’m with friends from downtown, and they ask me how can I live up here, with “those people.” I challenge them. Do you know “those people?” Do you have any idea WTF you’re talking about? The only way to break down stereotypes and start a true dialogue is for those in the community to challenge them at home. Claudio took a first step (too small for Stephen perhaps, but a first step) at conquering his fear–the more he can challenge that fear within himself and pass that knowledge on to others, the better we all will be.

  • ArtForStrangers
    October 23, 2010 at 3:15 pm

    Dear Stephen,

    Perhaps the greatest irony of all is that of all the people here, you are probably the one that has done the most damage to what was a genuine effort to bridge these very real differences.

    The latino community has it’s share of flaws; racism, homophobia, etc, just like everyone else. And any time someone takes a step to correcting that, even if it’s not as far as you would like, at least give them the props for trying, instead of shutting them down completely.

    Just like it would be ridiculous to “blame” the kids that have committed suicide for not being strong enough to overcome the malicious abuse and self-doubt that they were constantly being bombarded with, it’s ridiculous to blame the author for not being able to suddenly shut down the deeply ingrained homophobia that he, and I, and many of us in this neighborhood were told was the attitude we were supposed to adopt.

    Instead, just like we’d like to encourage gay youth with the idea of “It Gets Better”, maybe we can also encourage typically homophobic youth with the idea of “It’s Not As Bad As You’ve Been Taught To Believe”.

    I, too, personally know the author. He is no homophobe. His “hiding his face” was not an act of homophobia. He could have simply avoided going into the club in the first place, no? His “hiding his face” as he clearly explained was an instinctual (if misguided, but never-the-less genuine, and typical of many of us) act of “Latino-Culture-Phobia”.

    It’s not the gay patrons he was worried (or phobic) about. It was the people of his own community. Get it?

  • ArtForStrangers
    October 23, 2010 at 3:30 pm

    One more thing;

    Let’s not act like the gay community doesn’t have their own biases and bigotry. I’ve seen them relentlessly bash self proclaimed bisexuals as “flakes and too cowardly to commit”. I’ve seen them bash ‘divas’ or gays who were “too flamey”. I’ve seen ’em bash the “down-low” dudes. I’ve seen them pressure ‘still-in-the-closet’ young people into making their sexuality public, even though they didn’t feel ready to do so, and then punishing them for being ‘self-hating’.
    (Especially in the college “either-believe-what-I-believe-or-you’re-a-sellout” years).

    I’ve also been to gay clubs, and just as it’s disrespectful to a woman to keep harassing her once she made it clear that she’s not into you, it should be the same for men, gay or straight, if they go to a gay club.

    And last, but not least, just because someone is gay doesn’t mean it’s an open license to grab the other guy’s girlfriend’s tits. Maybe the boyfriend doesn’t mind, but maybe she does. (I know, shocking, right?) Just like the fact that I’m straight doesn’t give me the right to grab your boyfriend’s dick and laugh it off with a “hey, don’t worry, I’m straight.”. Right?

    So as you can see, we’re all fucked up. On all sides. Keep it real, dunny.

    • Stephen
      October 24, 2010 at 1:24 pm

      Artforstrangers –

      Please re-read my posts. I did not and am not calling the author out for not taking “enough” of a step toward understanding. My issue is with his statement that he “doesn’t have a problem with anybody” when his instinctual actions clearly say otherwise. By denying that he does indeed have a problem with those of us who identify as gay, he is relieving himself of all responsibility to grow and make efforts as an adult human to overcome those feelings.

      Only by being honest with your true feelings can one take the necessary steps towards truly understanding someone/something they fear, learning, and growing. Otherwise, we get nowhere. You’re an adult now. Maybe you were raised in an environment that wasn’t friendly to gay people. Some people are raised in environments which aren’t friendly to people of color. No more excuses. Take responsibility for your actions as an adult and be honest.

      Living in denial doesn’t do anyone any favors.

      • ArtForStrangers
        October 24, 2010 at 3:14 pm


        While perhaps not explicitly stated, it is certainly implied. In fact your most recent response restates it: You feel he is not absolved of the accusation of homophobia until he completely and explicitly rejects it in all it’s forms, totally, without question, without problem, no excuses, etc.

        It’s All or Nothing.

        The thing is, this wasn’t an article about how he completely absolved himself of all ingrained and ‘nurtured’ homophobia. (Which could have been the easy ‘Point Scoring, Feel Good Hit of the Summer’ way to do it). This was an article about him taking the first steps towards doing so in the first place. There’s no perfect formula for doing so, no instruction manual. I’d say he did pretty damn good considering the situation. Even if they were, in your eyes, clumsy steps, why tie the dude’s shoelaces together?

        It seems like your impatience stems from an unwillingness to accept someone holding conflicting / contradictory sentiments about a particular issue. I know very few people who have most of their values on such a clear distinctly defined lockdown that there is no room for a bit of conflict or contradiction, whether it’s about monogamy, stealing, sex at different age groups, abortion, and so on. That this subject happens to be of particular concern to you (and that’s just fine, and in fact, commendable and necessary) and thus makes it difficult for you to accept nothing less than a sort of full compliance to your values is, while understandable, perhaps in some situations, also unfair.

        I’m just saying, it seems to me you’re quite passionate about this very important issue, especially as it has taken ahold of many recent headlines these past few weeks, and I’d guess you’re willing to take a vocal, proactive role in facing down the scourge of homophobia that runs rampant in many communities, including ours.

        I just figured it be a better strategy to make the guy sitting on the fence feel more welcome to hang out on your side of the yard with a cold beer and good humor, than poppin’ him on the skull with a slingshot from afar.

  • Will Clark
    October 23, 2010 at 8:28 pm

    Thanks for the great read Claudio – more people ought to brave places they have concern/fear/discomfort with, it’s the only way that that concern/fear/discomfort will disapate. Reminded me of my first time in a gay bar when I was in college…. so it really resonated. I mean, I knew I was gay already but the fear was really strong that I would ‘see’ or experience something I wasn’t ready for. It takes awhile to shrug off some of that stuff but it takes a first step.

  • Mirkala Crystal
    October 24, 2010 at 11:51 am

    About me:
    In meeting my audiences around New York and beyond. I discovered something very exciting and liberating. That my audiences consisted of an incredible variety of ages and nationalities. As a Latin performer I mix all my music and feelings, that way I bring unto the stage the best entertainment possible to my audience. During my many shows I felt a freedom to explore my inner roots. I found that this way I was able to bring to the stage many styles of music and different types of personalities. I have always been comfortable impersonating many of today top performers. That’s why I always want my shows to reflect that special versatility. This way I could have fun and my audiences can enjoy a great show and a fun night out. I hope you can enjoy the different flavors I mix into my shows and that you find them colorful and uplifting. PS: I hope you have time to view some of the >video clips (Lady Ga Ga and others)I have put together on my web site Web Site. ENJOY.. My shows start on Nov 4 2020 at Le Boy Bar

    • mirkala crystal
      October 25, 2010 at 11:59 am

      Followup on my last reply.
      For Mirkala Crystal being Simply the Best comes natural. Mirkala started as the Gloria Estefan of the nineties and transformed her image as a multi talented Latina Female illusionist. Simply put, she is “Simply the Best” As Olga Tanon, Cher, Lady Ga Ga, Celine Dion, and Gloria Estefan impersonator you will ever see. Her looks, her hair, her make up and her costumes replicate the real-life persona of today music world celebrities she impersonates . For the last ten years she has toured Puerto Rico, Bermuda, Chicago, Washington DC, Fort Lauderdale, Miami Florida, Allentown Pa. Boston Mass. Syracuse NY, Utica NY, several NewJersey towns doing private events and of course NYC.
      For over a decade, Mirkala Crystal has mesmerized audiences with her high-energy performances. Since the mid 90s, she has amassed an extraordinary catalogue of collaborations and achievements. Now she will add Le Boy Bar in Inwood Upper Manhattan.
      Correction on her web site url: also you can check her on and facebook/mirkalacrystal

      Mirkala will rock the place and show she’s one artistic Latina celebrity impersonator.

  • Abbielicious
    October 24, 2010 at 5:00 pm

    I thought Claudio’s article was very well written and vunerable. Most of the straight guys I know would not even come within 100 feet of a gay club, let alone go in. I think the fact the Claudio did go in says a lot about him as a person. He was afraid at first, but got over his fear and took a leap of faith, and in the end had a great time. Bridge building and combating ignorance has to start somewhere, otherwise, we end up going nowhere.

  • Laszlo Xalieri
    October 24, 2010 at 5:34 pm

    How about we split the bundle of concepts we keep calling ‘homophobia’ into the two more relevant chunks we need to discuss: ‘detestation of homosexuals’ and ‘fear of being identified as a homosexual’? Those are clearly two different things. One makes you a bullier or at least a bully-sympathizer. The other is, basically, fear of the same “cultural enforcers” that make life hell for gays.

    I think it would be fascinating to restart this entire discussion with that frankly necessary spilt.

    • MrsFooliebear
      October 24, 2010 at 7:34 pm

      Laszlo, thanks for boiling down the problem here: that cultural biases/ social stigma regarding homosexuals (and in general) affect EVERYONE regardless of sexuality… empowering the bullies with “morality” and beating down individuality with fears of association.

  • Jim Swimm
    October 24, 2010 at 5:36 pm

    Wow! There sure are a lot of “them’s”, “those people’s”, and implied “others” running throughout all of these comments. If I could add my “two cents” on this (and it looks like I’m gonna whether y’all like it or not); I think this article is a step in a positive direction, but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with pointing out there’s still a ways to go here. I’ve found that so many people say & do things they don’t even realize are hurtful, or just inconsiderate, that it’s often necessary to point it out to them. But there’s no need to do it in an adversarial way.

    Look, I’m a giant, white ‘Mo who has lived in Inwood for nearly 7 years. I’ve been flat-out called “faggot” (hell, I’ve even had my dog called a “fag dog”!) plenty of times just walking down Dyckman St. Most recently, I stopped in a crosswalk at Academy and was nearly run down by a Latino guy who leaned out his car window and yelled, “Get out the way, faggot!”, even though I had the light to cross. It takes a toll — constantly bracing yourself for that sort of hatred to be thrown at you at any moment, from anywhere.

    I could let that harden me and put me in an “Us vs. Them” mentality, but who does that help? Not me, and certainly not this community. What helps is having discussions like this, people opening their minds — even in small, incremental amounts — to what an “other” person experiences. Once you do that, it becomes more and more difficult to lose sight of the humanity that binds us all.

  • erika
    October 24, 2010 at 7:13 pm

    stephen, your mock post about visiting a dominican club hit the nail right on the head. thank you for your comments. i disagree with comments stating that you are being overly sensitive and unduly critical of claudio’s post. anyone who read this post and did not feel it was offensive to gay people really needs to ask themselves why? how much bias is tolerable/acceptable? perhaps you weren’t offended because you personally know claudio (as i do) and can be sure that he is a kind and sensitive individual. i agree that he is, however his post was not. it left me with such a bad taste in my mouth.

    claudio, i hope i can comment candidly here (with the same amount of frankness with which you wrote your post) without it offending you personally because that is the last thing i’d want to do. this is such a complicated topic with many layers, but in the end it comes down to having respect for others. when the majority of americans feel the way you do (ashamed to be thought of as gay or afraid to be around too many gays), that sends a very strong message to the community of nonacceptance. it is up to the younger generations to make sure that we do not put any group down and make them feel ‘less than’. you said the same thing yourself. so i think we need to be a LOT more careful with the message that we (individually or collectively) put out there.

    it is not my opinion that you should hide the fact that you were nervous about going to le boy, or being seen there. but “i went to the club (once, and will probably never return)” does not equate to “i’m not a homophobe”. it does equate to “i’m less homophobic than my extremely homophobic friends”. there are degrees of homophobia, just like there are degrees of racism. if someone you knew was very forthright about the fact that they are a “little bit” racist, would you feel welcome around them? i think that is what you did with this post – “welcome to the neighborhood gays, don’t mind me, i’m only slightly phobic!”.

    why is it ok for this type of “candidness” in a post dealing with sexuality, when it would clearly not be acceptable in a post about race? i think that was stephen’s question, and as of yet i haven’t seen it addressed. why should we tolerate it in this case? homophobia in all its forms should seem just as illogical and backwards to us as racism does. i expect much more from my generation and those that follow. it’s not that it has to be all or nothing, but a post like this with all its humor combined with ignorance of wrongdoing seems very out of touch. for me it went too far and certainly pushed buttons, and i really don’t think i’m being overly sensitive.

    • ArtForStrangers
      October 25, 2010 at 7:21 am

      In the spirit of having what I feel is an interesting discussion about this subject, I’d like to discuss some of the points you bring up:

      Pardon the length of the post, but I’m also including your original statements for the sake of clarity and context:
      (and also I talk a lot)

      Erika: “it is not my opinion that you should hide the fact that you were nervous about going to le boy, or being seen there.”

      The very fact that he did not hide this fact, and that he expressed it honestly is exactly why he is being criticized so harshly. Damned if you do. Damned if you don’t.

      Erika: “…but “i went to the club (once, and will probably never return)” does not equate to “i’m not a homophobe”.”

      I went to “Rawhide” once. A very, for lack of a better word, raunchy kind of gay club. Very aggressive, and to be honest, cheeseball. Like the Village People is fo’ realz cheeseball. A giant wheel of mustached gay cheese running me over. I was invited by friends (straight and gay), but personally, I would never go back. Does this make me a homophobe? (Cheesophobe?)

      I’ve been invited to local parties. With lots of hip hop / merengue-type vibes. Bored outta my mind. I can’t dig the music or the typically inane conversations about “bitches and bling” and shitty Hennessey drinks. Does this make me Latinophobe? Or a self-hating Latino?

      Claudio went to Le Boy because he was invited. I too was invited to go that night, but couldn’t make it.

      While I might go just for the hell of it, if I choose not to go back, why should I feel guilty about that? Maybe I just won’t enjoy myself at a gay club any more than I might not enjoy myself at a hip hop themed party or a nude beach that never seems to be visited by other people except the very specific type of hairy humans you’d rather never see naked or an S&M swing club or even a Star Trek Convention cuz maybe I’m simply not into that sort of thing.

      I’ve been to other gay clubs, as well as lesbian clubs, where my ‘straightness’ wasn’t made to feel welcome. Sometimes it was a “poser invader” vibe, or some sort of “reverse fag-hag” thing or sometimes it was a downright “you’re not one of us, why are you here, get the fuck out” vibe. Who was being the bully there? Why would I want to return?

      I’ve been to other gay clubs where the drinks were god damn awesome, the vibe was awesome, the patrons were awesome and beautiful and dressed to the nines and flirty in that classy kinda way and they couldn’t give any less of a crap about whether I was straight or not but instead about whether I was having a good time and giving the place props for their awesome drinks and being inviting and kind and silly and all right, next round on me!

      The author never said he’d “never return to ANY gay club”. Just not this particular one. I believe that’s a very relevant distinction. As Laszlo Xalieri mentioned, Claudio has to deal with the same bullies, but for different reasons. And that comes with it’s own set of particular difficulties, because it might be bullying that’s coming from within a group of friends, usually ones we grew up with, and/or even family. Is this to be completely dismissed? I don’t assume we’d prefer to ignore one type of bullying over another.

      Erika: “if someone you knew was very forthright about the fact that they are a “little bit” racist, would you feel welcome around them?”

      What does “a little bit racist” mean?

      Is it how you feel when you walk down an unfamiliar, poorly-lit street, and you see a dozen dark-skinned thugged-out guys talking and laughing loud compared to how you’d feel if it were a dozen white goth guys smoking cigarettes or a dozen asian kids dressed up in Nike gear?

      What do we call what some of the gay men feel around our neighborhood when they walk past a bunch of latino dudes playing dominoes with little plastic beer cups scattered about compared to how they feel when they walk past a bunch of stinky ravers in Union Sq park?

      All I’m saying is I think many more of us hold ‘a little bit racist’ views a lot more than we’d like to admit. They’re biases. Sometimes to enough of a degree to qualify as bigotry. Perhaps it was a bad past experience. Perhaps it was crap that was embedded into our heads from when we were kids, told to us by ignorant parents and peers. But they exist. Just like homophobia. Or whatever variation or degree or kind that the author is accused of possessing. Like I said, it’s not an on/off switch. Most of us are incapable of fixing our own internal flaws. The vast majority never have the courage to admit it. Especially in public. But it’s there. I’m sure every single person that’s left a thought on this page has some sort of misguided bias of one sort or another. And if they claim they don’t, I’ll call bullshit. I’m not being cynical. Just real.

      Erika: “i think that is what you did with this post – “welcome to the neighborhood gays, don’t mind me, i’m only slightly phobic!”.”

      I think that’s an unfair statement, because it ignores the many other statements he’s also made that sound quite welcoming and encouraging and hopeful about their success.

      Erika: “why is it ok for this type of “candidness” in a post dealing with sexuality, when it would clearly not be acceptable in a post about race? i think that was stephen’s question, and as of yet i haven’t seen it addressed.”

      Why wouldn’t it be acceptable if it was about race? I’d imagine we’d be having the same type of heated discussion. People would be passionate about it, and present their views, and here and there someone might fly off the handle, and I’d be in there with long winded posts yapping about race instead of sexuality.

      There are local blogs full of heated discussions about Dominicans/Latinos and how they “ruin” this neighborhood and how it must be “something in their culture”.

      Erika: “why should we tolerate it in this case? homophobia in all its forms should seem just as illogical and backwards to us as racism does.”

      I’m pretty sure not a single person here has condoned homophobia in any form. I’m sure we’d all agree, including the original author, that it is illogical, and backwards, and that it should be completely eradicated.

      And I hope every person here would appreciate any effort in taking steps towards doing so, no matter how clumsy and ‘1 step forwardy 2 step backwardy god dammit walk faster, man!’ those steps may be.

  • uptownco
    October 24, 2010 at 8:57 pm

    First of all, I want to thank everyone for sharing their thoughts on this post and the very real issues it touches upon. Like I said prior, I think that Claudio’s post was extremely courageous and in the words of Abbielicious “vulnerable”. While he may have made a mad dash to the club that night, he is on this site telling the neighborhood and ultimately the world that he went to a gay club and that he had a good time. The reason this post struck a cord is because of his honesty. By going to a gay club and then writing about his experience, Claudio took a brave first step. I can honestly understand why it may not be an enough for some and I appreciate their candidness as well.


    • Stephen
      October 25, 2010 at 9:24 am

      “The reason this post struck a cord is because of his honesty.”

      Actually, the reason this post struck a cord with me is because of his dishonesty, which I’ve tried to make clear.

      His statement that he’s not homophobic and has no issues with anyone simply does not correspond to his actual behavior. Its a small statement but extremely powerful because it relieves him of all responsibility to grow. The “i’m cool with you i just dont want to be mistaken as one of you” attitude is exactly why teens feel they will never be accepted by friends and family. It all comes from this exact attitude.

      “I’m cool with you bro, even though your Dominican, i just dont want to be seen with you at mamajuana because i’m afraid what people might think if they see me there.”

  • siega
    October 24, 2010 at 11:19 pm

    You all bring up great points. But the sentence that made me slap my face and think OFFENSIVE, or even ignorant, is the “no, no,no, this isn’t a coming out of the closet” bit. That’s as if I said I went to an African American club in INSERT city/nabe but “don’t worry, I would never sleep with a black guy/girl.” That strikes me as the opposite of brave and courageous.

  • ArtForStrangers
    October 25, 2010 at 7:41 am

    If we had the time, and everyone had the courage, to publicly state every feeling and sentiment they had inside about every sort of subject, I wonder how much energy we could expend in finding the crappily expressed ones and riding the author for it?

    Yes. Let’s imagine that.

    Let’s see what you’d have to say about men. Or women that dress “too” sexy. Or mothers that use formula. Or your neighbors belief in santeria. Or your prima’s weight since she had the baby. Or your previous caucasian boss. Or the guys your co-worker chooses to date. Or what they post on Facebook.

    Let us all lay all that stuff out there, so it can be scrutinized and analyzed.

    I assume it will be well thought out, flawless expressions of exactly what it is you meant to get across. Every time.

    And let’s put our real names on it. Not some anonymous alias tonterias. And let’s not allow anyone to only read all this as lurkers, but instead be obligated to participate.

    Woo hoo! Who’s with meh?!

    *cue wind, grasshoppers, and tumbleweeds.

    Also, I’m not sure why people keep going to the race comparison.

    Not all of us are sensitive about our race. So I tan better than you. Y que carajo me importa eso?

  • Stephen
    October 25, 2010 at 9:09 am

    Artforstrangers –

    I appreciate your posts and have read them all, and frankly dont have the time or energy to comment on everything, except this:

    “Let’s see what you’d have to say about men. Or women that dress “too” sexy. Or mothers that use formula. Or your neighbors belief in santeria. Or your prima’s weight since she had the baby. Or your previous caucasian boss. Or the guys your co-worker chooses to date. Or what they post on Facebook.”

    The ignorance of this statement is something i am having a hard time comprehending. Do you know anyone who has jumped off the GWB because society doesn’t accept their sexy dress? Or mothers who have been abandoned by their families because they use formula? Do you know a group of people who don’t have equal legal status in this country because of what they post on facebook?

    Either you lack knowledge of what a gay person is, how they are treated in society in general, in our neighborhood specifically, and lack knowledge of the civil rights struggle of gay american in general, or you are willing to say anything to demean the conversation and defend your friend. please help me understand.

    • ArtForStrangers
      October 25, 2010 at 1:55 pm


      The post you are referring to has nothing to do with equating the effects of homophobia to those other things I mentioned.

      I was making reference to how we all might make inartfully constructed comments about any particular subject, and to pick out one sentence or one idea and to try and take it out of all it’s context in order to bash them over the head with it is something of a cheap shot.

      And that’s what a lot of people are doing here. They take out one or two sentences, remove it from the overall context and tone of the entire article, and use that statement to build a straw man which is then set ablaze.

      It’s kind of what you just finished doing to me.

      How come no one ever takes Claudio’s last paragraph out of context?

      When he says “We came to learn that gays are no different than any of us; and considering the discrimination we’ve faced, why would we want someone else to face the same.”, how come that isn’t misconstrued in some way? Why isn’t this statement, this particular line, used to help you construct and define what the overall tone of Claudio’s post is?

      Maybe that doesn’t sell your newspapers?

      Really? Claudio is the threat here?

      If I was able to take a little peek inside your mind, and find a trace of bias or bigotry because you get shook when walking past a group of dark-skinned men, can I then refer to you as the racist that is the downfall of mankind and for all of us melanin toned-folk to run the other way when we see ya walking down the block?

      That’s just silly, isn’t it.


      It is.

      • Stephen
        October 25, 2010 at 2:26 pm

        I really have no idea how I can be any clearer here… The author made a claim –

        “Now before you think I’m some sort of homophobe, remember, I went to the club. I have no issues with anybody.”

        A claim that I challenged based on his description of his actions. I don’t see how that’s misconstruing anything. I also explained why I felt this was such a damaging claim to make, because if we all acted in a homophobic way and then claimed we weren’t homophobic, how can we address the homophobia? Just like if we all acted racist, and said, “its ok i’m not a racist”, where does that get us?

        get it?

        And I didn’t take your post out of context. I questioned why you would put our discussion of homophobia on the same level as mother’s who use formula. Simple as that. Was it to demean the conversation and bring it down to the same level we debate clothing choices? I’d still love to hear an answer. I never said you equated the effects of homophobia with those things, I questioned why you equated our debate of the issue with those things. I tried to illustrate to you that the “effects” of mother’s who use formula doesn’t end with some of them being abandoned by their families, so why would the discussion of that issue be compared with the discussion of homophobia?

        That’s just silly, isn’t it.


        It is.

  • F. P. Smearcase
    October 25, 2010 at 11:34 am

    Look, what’s offensive here isn’t the homophobia, per se. The guy gets points for acknowledging it and, apparently, working on it. What’s gross is the deluded tone of self-congratulation for being such a brave boy. Anyone smart enough to realize that his friends’ “no homo” bullshit is in fact really harmful should realize that going to a gay bar (it’s 2010, for fuck’s sake) with is collar up is not exactly a huge blow for equality.

    Do something real. I’m not saying you need to run for office on the “I Love Gay People” platform but, Jesus, is it really that big a step to stop saying “No homo!” like a fourteen-year-old when some friend says his back hurts? (Um, what? Because he was on his back getting fucked? It seems the only people who have gay sex on their mind more than gay men is straight men, because that is a STRETCH.)

    But for now, stop selling yourself as more progressive than your friends while you’re writing stuff like this. “White, Black, and Latino men all coming together on an Uptown street,” is a good thing, except when some of those white, black, and Latino men are united by adolescent gay panic. “The gentrifying crowd meets the local crowd and everyone was getting along”? Well, not quite everyone, by the sound of it. Think a little harder about this stuff. If it’s really true that Dominicans in Inwood aren’t interested in beating up gays, why are you so terrified to stand in that line?

  • Claudio
    October 25, 2010 at 12:14 pm

    Is it right that I’ve said “No Homo” for the past 5-6 years of my life? No. It’s immature. It was part of urban Hip-Hop culture and people found it funny including me. I admit that.

    Is it wrong that I turned away when I was entering the club? Yes. It showed I couldn’t handle the idea of being labeled as a gay man. I didn’t fear being beat up. That’s not it.

    Did I try to absolve myself by saying the whole “I got gay friends” thing? Yes.

    Is it wrong that I thought for a second about turning away from Mickey when he was approaching me on Dyckman? Yes it is.

    But I can assure you this – I’m not one of these guys clubbing gay men across the city. I’m not some Midwestern/Southern pastor or regular joe who detest gays. That’s not who I am. Not even close.

    But do I have faults? Absolutely.

    When I hear the term homophobe, it strikes me as strong. Real strong. It’s a word i don’t want to be associated with and tend to associate with the individuals i just mentioned. But you know what? I can’t control what you think.

    Lastly, everyone seems to be acting all holier than thou in this post. As if no one here has a discriminatory bone in their body.
    Everyone has their own little prejudices.

    You can be white have a Black girlfriend, black friends, etc., and act like nothing is there when a group of 12 white kids hang out on a corner. But when a group of 12 black kids hang out on a corner, you may cross the street or clutch your purse or whatever.

    Does that mean that you are Mel Gibson, Farrakhan, Pat Robertson or Michael Richards? Absolutely not. Something may have happened to you in the past that makes you cross the street. TV may be the reason why and how it brainwashes people as well.

    So what I’m trying to get across is that if you label me as homophobic, I must be at the bottom rung of the ladder when it comes to it.

    There’s different levels of everything.

    Some of the people who are disagreeing with me in this post seem to act like this is all black and white. It’s not. I’m sure not all of your fathers or mothers agree with you dating men. I’m sure not all of them sit down in the living room with your partners and fully accept it. I’m sure. But instead of coming at them with anger or ex-communicating them, why don’t you allow them to grow to a point where they will be comfortable. Where they won’t hold those beliefs. That’s really all I’m saying here.

    Thanks for all those comments.

  • Stephen
    October 25, 2010 at 12:54 pm

    Claudio –

    This post says everything the article doesn’t, and everything I wish the article had said. Its a very different take and tone than the article, and one that is much more conducive to growing. You’re right, we all have our own little prejudices, but only by acknowledging them and being honest about them can we take responsibility for them and try our best to overcome them. Because in the end, it doesn’t matter how you or I were raised, what our parents may have taught us about other people- what matters is that as adults we recognize that our worth is equal, and we all deserve the same amount of respect simply because we are all humans (neighbors, community members etc). That’s not to say that our little prejudices will ever go away totally. It just means that we can recognize them when they rear their ugly heads and we can take the necessary steps to make sure they don’t get the best of us.


  • EM Prentiss
    October 25, 2010 at 3:25 pm

    Arka duh rainbow flag?

  • ArtForStrangers
    October 25, 2010 at 3:39 pm


    You keep pointing out that he can’t claim to not be homophobic, at least to some degree, because he expressed some homophobia, at least to some degree. You’ve got your megaphone, full blast, pointing at Claudio like if you just caught a flying witch, while gleefully holding up the smoking gun.

    The smoking gun that was handed to you, on a platter, by the very guy who apparently has used this gun to shoot himself in the foot.

    So, what claim are you making?

    The guy admitted to having homophobic tendencies. He clearly expressed it. It’s all there in contradictory black & white. You pointing it out is not some A-HAA! GOTCHA! moment. We know that he’s holding contradictory sentiments because he himself told us.
    He admits to holding conflicting sentiments. He admits to being flawed.

    See, it’s interesting to me how no one addresses the point made previously about being ‘a little bit racist’, because I’d bet no one wants to admit to it, because god forbid it would help provide an example that we all hold flawed sentiments on one thing or another. No way, man. We can’t let that interfere with Claudio’s public whippin’. Claudio must be made to pay for his shitty sentence structure and honesty. Bring out the stones!

    It’s also interesting how no one addresses the bullying that goes on within the gay community itself. That part of the puzzle, we’ll just keep in the box, out of sight. We don’t want anything interfering with our clearly cut shadeless villian.

    And Stephen, once again, I wasn’t putting our discussion of homophobia at the same level as baby formula. Do you really think I’m that bananas, that incapable of understanding the real difference?

    Nah. Of course you don’t. You’re just being a meanie, aintcha?

    Anyway, you think homophobia sucks, and I think homophobia sucks, and we’d both like to see it eradicated along with racism, immigrant bashing, baby seal killin’, and the whole Canadian Celine Dion / Justin Bieber enterprise.

    That’s reason enough for us to realize we’re on the same team.

  • ArtForStrangers
    October 25, 2010 at 3:43 pm

    Also, I’d like to commend everyone here for, as of this moment, not using the word Nazi.

  • Stephen
    October 25, 2010 at 3:49 pm

    And as I’ve tried to say over and over again – in order to eradicate it we have to admit its there.

    And with that you get the last word. Go for it.

    • ArtForStrangers
      October 25, 2010 at 3:57 pm

      I’ll use my last word to quote something that’s very true and important to understand:

      “…in order to eradicate it we have to admit its there.”


  • CletusRayRay
    October 25, 2010 at 4:26 pm

    I agree with Stephen and Erika’s take on the article and their comments.

    Upon reading Claudio’s clarifying post above sheds more light on the topic and what he left out in the article.

    I don’t know Claudio. Maybe I’ll meet him in the future but I doubt it’ll be at a gay bar. I’m just too lazy to go to neighborhood bars unless food is involved.

    I copied and pasted Claudio’s article out and replaced all references to “homo”, “homophobia”, “anti-homo” and “gay” with “Dominican” and “anti-Dominican.” Then did a re-read. Very interesting. Everyone should try it.

    Homophobic? Does fear of being thought of as gay or hanging with gays fall into that category? Does it make my relatives bigoted if I didn’t want them to know I was hanging with others not of my own race? Does it make one’s friend a racist or bigot if they refuse to acknowledge your existence when they hang with friends of their own kind? Oh, the shame! Hmmm…

    BTW, why would anyone care what any of your neighbors or acquaintances thought? Is that sort of like keeping up with the Jones’ or maintaining your position in the Junior League or Social Register? “What’s up Cletus? I didn’t know you eat broccoli! Nasty stuff!” Eh? Who are you to me, again? Oh, right, you’re NOBODY.

    I am a racist. I am a bigot. I certainly think so. I have my own prejudices. Why? Who knows? Who cares? Against whom? Does it really matter to anyone but me? But how I react and what I do with my views/feelings are two different things.

    Personally, I think racism, bigotry, prejudices are reactions – based upon what we are taught, what we want to believe to be true, and/or our oftentimes very narrow experiences rather than on reality.

    Reading Claudio’s last post makes me think that he’s, well, starting to think on this whole “No homo” thing and that’s a good thing on an individual level. Whether or not he and others like him (ooh! I’m grouping!) would stop in to have a drink at a gay bar sans female wingman is something else entirely and likely never to happen in his lifetime. No homo, indeed.

  • Petey
    October 26, 2010 at 11:52 am

    I love when articles like these are written because of the comments and discussions they provoke. Everyone that has commented has made valid points. I commend Claudio for writing about his experience at Le Boy. It was definitely a step in the right direction. Like others have mentioned, there are a lot of things he needs to work on, but I’m not here to judge the guy. I’m certainly not perfect. He’s working on it.

    However, I want one point to be made clear – everyone is capable of violence. History has shown us that the most unlikely individuals when placed in particular circumstances and faced with significant pressure, can commit atrocities. As a Dominican straight man from the Bronx, I will disagree with Claudio and say that there is significant potential to be bullied and verbally attacked by our peers. Of course you didn’t want people to see you on that line. You were on Dyckman Street. Maybe you aren’t scared of anyone in particular, but you certainly don’t want to be labeled. But who does? No one wants to be labeled. Shoot, even though I’m proud to be Dominican, I don’t like to be defined by it. People are more complicated than just being Dominican or being gay.

    There are a lot of things wrong with certain aspects of Dominican culture, and I myself have clashed with my own parents about it. Especially when you combine the Dominican and Catholic angle. I’ve told my parents thousands of times, “You wouldn’t be so critical of gays if I was gay.” Because in the end, it’s easy for people to judge one another when they aren’t personally affected by it.

    Going to a gay club does not make anyone understand what it’s like to be a gay person nor does it mean that Claudio is absolved of anything. But again, I don’t think he was even trying to say that. He was honest and wrote his piece in blog format, so it wasn’t the most well written article and there are definitely things he could have re-worded. But I prefer we talk about it than hold it all in.

  • Mino
    October 26, 2010 at 12:58 pm

    Dios mio, we have a long way to go, but this is definitely a start, especially because of all the comments that arose from the initial article. Thanks to Stephen, Erika, Claudio and Led and all others who posted. We need to continue this conversation.

    We must all do our part everyday to strengthen our community through dialogue. We need to unite in the cause for justice and equality for EVERYONE. We need to do this for the health of our community and the future of our children and youth.

    Hmmm….I wonder if we should all sit down and continue the conversation…or better yet, create a play around this issue. 🙂

  • uptownco
    October 26, 2010 at 4:35 pm

    Again, I would like to thank everyone for sharing their thoughts. As Mino commented, this is a conversation that must be continued. Tyler Clementi’s tragic death made me realize that straight folks, such as myself, can no longer remain on the sidelines and spectate. Equal rights for all; irrespective of race, religion, creed or sexual preference, is the only way forward.

    Check out an earlier Op-Led on this topic. Thanks.–-homophobia-social-media-the-death-of-tyler-clementi/


  • Marcia
    October 28, 2010 at 10:04 am

    Why can’t we just read what Claudio wrote without criticando y analizing cada word? Jeshhhhh….

    • ay_si
      November 20, 2010 at 1:37 am

      Oh yes, criticism and analysis. Such terrible, terrible things. Why would anyone think about anything, consider the facts at hand, and formulate an opinion? Right, homegirl? They must all be such haters!

  • Mr. Marlynn
    October 28, 2010 at 3:56 pm

    Wow – lots of interesting comments. Discussion, and by extention, disagreement, is a good thing.

    First, let me applaud Claudio on being honest about his feelings & experiences. That honesty is a critical first step in dealing with fears, issues, misunderstanding, etc. I, too, was surprised when Le Boy opened in that spot on Dyckman; not the most gay-friendly spot they could have chosen. But, interestingly, as our neighborhood continues to gentrify and the non-Latino gay population increases, it seems to empower the local gay Latino/a/s. I’ve lived up here for 8 years and the local gay Latino energy has definitely gotten stronger. (I am an African-American gay male.) Power in numbers? Whatever, I say it’s a good thing.

    I think this ‘no homo’ thing is some bullshit. Someone makes a comment about a sore back and others immediately think its because of gay sex?? That line of thinking speaks volumes about where some people’s heads are really at! I certainly understand peer pressure, but I’ve also learned that the ones making the most noise about NOT being gay, are the ones you have to watch.

    If people are secure in their OWN sexuality, they don’t have to worry about who someone else is kickin it with. Do YOU; let others do them. I don’t mean to trivialize or over-simplify it, but life is relatively simple – sometimes we work hard to make it more difficult.

  • JR
    October 28, 2010 at 7:02 pm

    Very interesting post. hey Claudio get in contact with george at Le Boy @ [email protected] , After ownership of Le boy viewed this post they want to extend a special invitation to you.

  • Ronald
    October 28, 2010 at 11:46 pm

    great article..

  • Mike
    October 29, 2010 at 1:25 am

    Crazy thing is that the owner of leboy is straight

  • david f
    November 4, 2010 at 3:04 am

    This article brought me to uptown collective for the first time, and i’m glad to have read it and to have discovered this blog. As one of the ‘gentrifying non-latino gays’ (been in inwood 3 years), i am so happy to see this conversation taking place. To improve our community and to fight effectively for the resources we deserve, we need to be a unified neighborhood that finds strength in its diversity instead of letting our differences divide and weaken us.

    I appreciate Claudio’s article, because I feel it was very much from the heart. He put himself in a situation that clearly made him feel very uncomfortable to try and educate himself and expand his horizons. That in itself deserves praise.

    However, I would ask Claudio to think back on all of the emotions he experienced dealing with his socially ingrained discomfort with potentially being perceived to be gay. Now, imagine experiencing all of those same things, but actually BEING gay. Next, imagine experiencing those feelings everyday of your life from puberty onwards and having them reinforced by school bullies/disapproving family members. This is what LGBT kids in this neighborhood (and many others) are going through every day; and for some, it leads to self-destructive behavior.

    This is why stamping out socially ingrained homophobia is so important. Aside from how it makes us feel as individuals, it literally kills kids. As responsible adults, it is our duty to make an effort every day to reverse our internalized biases and to never act in a way that further promotes any kind of prejudice in society.

    November 30, 2010 at 3:30 pm

    […] and delivered with a provocative post that was brave, honest and also quite vulnerable. The piece, The Night I Went to Le Boy, ended up generating a ton of traffic and comments but also a considerable amount of flack. Anyway, […]

  • Mention At An Online News Assoc. Panel… | Live Above Mediocrity
    May 3, 2011 at 11:39 am

    […] Link to article […]

  • Chris J Gordon
    September 18, 2013 at 5:36 pm

    I see these posts are two years old. I just moved to Inwood from Indianapolis(not where I originate) with my longtime partner. While walking the neighborhood we saw the rainbow flag tangled above the blank doors and investigated further. This list of posts is revelatory. So many critical, inquisitive, active voices. An incredible, vital community. I have not been to Le Boy(and I don’t expect much…I’m an old skool homocore punk)…but, it sounds like a good place to have a drink and maybe get loose enough to dance. Nothing wrong with that.

    • admin
      September 18, 2013 at 5:44 pm

      Welcome to neighborhood!

      The UC